I had a childhood friend over the other day and we got into an argument about problems in society and how to help and coming up with possible suggestions on how to solve them.
This friend of mine (well sort of) has had a history of being judgmental. Ever since childhood, he doesn't seem to have changed much.
He always has a sense of judging people and setting certain standards. Standards he can't normally meet. He always has a way of looking everything in a black and white sort of manner.
When we were discussing problems in society he threw all sorts of accusations my way as he always does. He claimed never suggest solutions for society unless you are willing to backup your solutions with physical effort.
He accused me of hypocrisy and my suggestions he insisted would be very little contribution to funding humanitarian projects that the idea itself is simply pointless.
I asked him then why he bothers throwing change to beggars who will run out of it within a day and go back to square one. He insists it's the least he can do for them.
He throws accusations at me of eating at restaurants and wasting money when there's food in the house and when people cannot even afford to buy a square meal, I am wasting my own money.
I asked him if he ever eats outside. His reply rarely. I asked if spending money unnecessarily is such a big deal, why does he have that expensive mac laptop on the desk.
Only a bit of pressuring and questioning by me resulted in him backing off, but of course he didn't admit his hypocrisy.
Next thing he's ranting all about me and how much effort I put in to help my parent running the house and how I live off my parents' earnings.
He might have a point, but I still do contribute such as taking out the waste, putting away the dishes in the dishwasher and taking them out when they're clean, shoveling the snow off our property in the winter time.
That's nothing he accused. I then asked him what he does to help his parents? I reminded him of his odd sleeping hours (I myself go through them sometimes) when I visit his house at six o clock in the evening and he's still asleep.
He insists he's changed since then, so I pressure him asking what he exactly does that is significant in contribution to his parents. And guess what his reply was. Taking out the garbage, cleaning the kitchen. ^_^
He also claimed that he gives his parents a hundred dollars a month which is a quarter of his income, but still really nothing.
The last thing he was babbling about was that planes have no authority to be in the sky and they are causing environmental damage. I asked how he ended up in North America all the way from Pakistan if it wasn't for planes. He claimed it was one trip and that a lot of pollution is caused by families going on holidays and global warming is caused by so many planes.
I asked him if he knew that Boeing is going out of it's way to produce planes that pollute far less and that airliners soon may have to pay emission taxes to the destinations they fly to.
And the fact that many if not most passengers use planes to fly for business and other necessary reasons which are not for pleasure.
He still wouldn't stop accusing planes. I asked why he then rides on cars and buses. He claimed rarely, I insisted rarely doesn't count and pointed out the fact that he used a bus to come to my house. ^_^
Our arguments spanned on a lot of topics, but in the end I realized all it took was some questioning and pressuring to show him he was being such a hypocrite.
And that's normally how judgmental people should be dealt with. When they throw accusations your way, all it takes is a bit of questioning, common sense and pressure to show them their hypocrisy.
Show them any sign of guilt at their accusations and they have won over you. Always be sure to pressure them when questioning them. If they hide the answers, then they obviously do the same or similar things they accuse you or others of. If they let out their answers, case closed.
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